what the world needs now...

Is love sweet love

Yeah, that and grocery stores made specifically for chefs.

Going to the grocery store with the general public makes me kookoo. Going to the grocery store with the general public when they are shopping for holiday meals drove me almost to the point of being the next face on america's most wanted.

I was at the store to purchase ingredients to make 3 types of biscotti. Pretty straightforward. I needed 2 kinds of dried fruit,3 kinds of nuts, almond and orange oils,and parchment paper. I also planned on picking up some extra flour, sugar, and eggs since I am doing more baking than usual right now.

Annoying person number 1)While I'm getting flour I can't help but notice a woman my age looking at boxed cookie mixes. She seems quite upset that she may have to add eggs or oil or basically any other item to the mix in order for it to become cookies. She finally decided to "screw it, let's get the break and bake kind"

Tears form in my eyes as I realize how truly lazy americans really are.

Then a smile emerges when I realize this means job security for me.

Annoying person 2) this lady really irritated me because she actually spoke to me. After inspecting my cart and deciding I "look like a baker" she asks if evaporated milk and condensed milk are the same thing. I explain that no they are incredibly different. She wants to know if she can subsitute condensed for evaporated because it seems this grocery store doesn't have it. I reach up, turn the can of condensed milk facing the proper direction and tell her the store has plenty the can was just turned around.

It doesn't end there...she then asks me if condensed milk comes FAT FREE or lower in sugar... I remind her that it is called "sweetened" condensed milk for a reason and reassure her that one can won't kill her.

She then asks if I can tell she's never baked before in her life.

No, really? I thought she was the pastry instructor at my culinary school...

Just another soccer mom keeping my job secure.

Annoying person 3) maybe this isn't entirely deserved but he still irritated me. I needed dried cherries for my biscotti and couldn't find any. When I asked a worker he proudly handed me dried cranberries with artificial cherry flavoring. Seriously?!?!

I settle for dried blueberries

Then, I need unsalted pistachios. No pistachios salted or unsalted in the nut aisle. Worker suggests I look in the produce section. Bingo-pistachios right next to the pineapples...all of them pre-salted.

I'll deal.

Now I need parchment paper. "Oh we've been out of that for weeks but we do have freezer paper" great plastic coated freezer paper in my oven. Perfect.

Had to go to Target...

So the moral of this story is: I hate grocery shopping with regular people. I hate wandering the grocery store for hours looking for 10 items. Things should be logical! I shouldn't have to look by the oatmeal and maple syrup for corn syrup.when is the last time someone put corn syrup on their damn pancakes???

As a worker in the food service industry I should have a grocery store for only me and my collegues. Well...not all my collegues cuz some of them are stupid too, but you get the idea.

And to my "regular" friends out there please please don't be those obnoxious people making other cooks lives hell at the grocery.

xoxoxox