Reflections

Lately I've been thinking about how I got to the place in my life where I am right now. If someone had asked me 3 years ago what I'd be doing for a living my answer certainly wouldn't have been cooking. It seems crazy to get PAID to cook food.

Many of you may not know that just about 3 years ago I was in my senior year of college at the University of Illinois at Chicago pursing a degree in psychology. From as long ago as I can remember I always wanted to help people so it seemed a natural progression to go into the field of psychology.

I always loved to cook. It was something I grew up watching my grandma and my mom do and I knew good food made people happy. During college when life was stressful I would cook. It was a way to calm down and connect. Cooking was a form of instant gratification. Never a career path, always a hobby, sometimes a joke. Anytime studies got rough I would joke that I was going to drop out and open a restaurant.

During a summer away from college working as an Environmental Education director at a summer camp I had a lot of time to think. I had the opportunity to cook for a lot of staff members at the camp as well as many of the children. I knew in the back of my mind psychology was an interest not a passion and I knew in the back of my mind that cooking made me happy. The realization came to the front of my mind when a 9 year old asked me "Are you a chef?"

That question hit me like a ton of bricks. Why aren't I a chef? I couldn't formulate a reason. I spent the next several weeks going over and over this question in my head. I spoke with some friends and co-workers and made my decision.

When I returned to Chicago I made the choice to leave UIC and pursue a culinary degree at Kendall College. It was a huge crazy step but I had never felt better. I took a job as a breakfast cook at a bed & breakfast and began my new life.

Even at this point I still had no idea why I wanted to be a cook. I just knew that I loved it. I didn't know what I wanted to do with a career as a cook and was worried I wouldn't feel fulfilled without "helping people.

When the problems with Monsanto began to really come to a head for my parents I felt a lot of mixed emotions. I was scared Monsanto would sue my dad and take everything he's worked so hard for, I was angry at an evil company, I felt helpless being so far away and not there with my mom and dad, and I felt guilty for having a job that wasn't in jeopardy.

But, it was in these moments that I realized why it was my destiny to become a cook. I am the farmer's daughter who grew up to be the cook. I live in both worlds of food now. Where food comes from and where food goes. I am in the best possible place as a cook.

And, it was in those moments that I realized I can help people as a cook. This blog has become my way to not feel scared, angry, helpless and guilty. I realize more and more each day what my role is and will be. As a cook and an educator. Even in the passing moments at work when I'm able to talk about what kind of greens we are cleaning because I've seen them growing in my mom's garden. Or when someone has a question about Genetically Modified foods. I am helping people.

Thomas Keller says there is no such thing as perfect food only the idea of it. And our role as a chef is to strive towards perfection not to achieve it, but rather, to make people happy. That is what cooking is all about. For me this rings very true but for me it goes beyond making people happy with eating the food. I want people to have the experience of food.

To have just one guest who understands their meal came from a farmer's field or a gardener's greenhouse not from my kitchen would mean success to me.

So, now I am a cook and I have my amazing parents to thank for their support in my decision.


To my grandma for always cooking and letting me help

To my mom who taught me that tomatoes come from your garden not the grocery store and for introducing me to the vidalia.

And to my dad for showing me what real work is. For getting up before the sun and working until the work is done.


And, both of my parents for doing something they love even if it means they'll never be rich.

Dad, no matter what Monsanto does to us, everything you've worked for you've earned and that is all that matters.

I am a cook. Today, I understand why.